That's right I said it.  Throw away your karaoke CD collection.  I'm talking to you Mr. “I think it's cool to get up and sing Johnny Cash every third song”.  Or how about “hey I'm a drunk college student and am going to sing the Bohemian Rhapsody with my drunk college friends”.  You know what?  Me and the rest of the bar, we don't want to hear it. Unless you're some cute blonde that is going to jump up there and sing Taylor Swift we don’t want to hear it.

Stop Singing and Get Help

Chances are you need professional help.  Not the kind where you are mentally insane but you need some vocal coaching.  Most of you get off on performing karaoke, getting up on stage night after night sounding horrible.  The worst part is that your goofy smile implies that you think that you are good at singing.

How To Find A Good Vocal Coach

So you think that you might need a good vocal coach?  The best thing that you could do is call your local university vocal performance department and ask if they are taking on any private students.  Chances are you can find a classically trained vocal coach that understands the physiology of singing.  The coach will help you understand how to properly use air supply and apply musicality, including pitch and vocal fluctuation.

If you're not near a local university, the next best thing they could do a search Yahoo, Google or Ask for the term's “private vocal coaching”.  There you will find vocal coaches in your area to help you learn to be a better singer so that the next time you go to a karaoke bar you're not booed off the stage.  Furthermore, patrons like me who just want to enjoy a beer don't have to sit through bad singing and witness your goopy smile, implying that you think your hot stuff.

Some People Don’t Have It

If you give the local training a chance and you still can't sing after six months to a year, forgot it, you're done, that's it, you'll never be a singer.  If this is your case, just throw out your karaoke CD collection, because we don't want to hear it.  Don't feel bad, don't feel sad, we all have our own gifts and talents.  Your talent may be like mine, sipping a beer on a barstool making fun of bad karaoke singers.